Although Coaching has become a multi-million dollar industry, there is no clear definition for coaching. Learn here how it works, and how coaching is different from consulting, mentoring, and therapy
Performance Improvement Plans (PIPs) usually don’t work. Once you’ve ticked everything on your to do list what a boss needs to do to create an engaging work environment, then low individual performance is usually an indication for just one thing: the employee is simply in the wrong job. No PIP will resolve this problem; it will just prolong the suffering before the employment contract is ultimately terminated.
Thu Jul 19 0:05 a.m local time
Unfulfilled desires and attachment make our lives complicated. Happiness does not depend on achieving a specific outcome. Happiness comes from what you are doing while you are doing it. Learn how to practice detached involvement to experience happiness NOW.
Death teaches valuable lessons. It can help you re-evaluate what is important to you. Maybe it helps you not to postpone things that need to be done, not to hold back words that need to be said. Maybe it makes you reconsider how to spend the valuable but limited time that is given to you. Maybe you start adjusting the actions in your life in a way that helps you to minimize the regrets you might otherwise have one day.
May you seize the day.
Do you feel you have to drink alcohol because of the expectations of other people? Drink when you don’t want to drink just because your job “requires” it or in order to get a feeling of belonging?
Stop wearing your social mask. Don’t compromise your health, and don’t say yes when you feel you should say no. Learn to say no with confidence!
It is Sunday noon. The last day of my stay in Germany. Strange feelings. Although I have chosen that my new home is in Thailand, it is hard to leave my parents and the country in which I was born and in which everything is so familiar and easy.
I have stayed for more than two weeks, but as it is the last day, it is a special day. How can I make best use of it? How can I make this special day special? And: have I made optimum use of the other 14 days?
To make more use of commuting time, I sometimes listen to audio books. During my stay in Germany, whenever I drove the car, I listened to Anthony Robbins “Live with Passion”. And suddenly I feel reminded of his concept of scarcity.
In short, it’s about the fact that we humans usually value things more once we realize they are scarce. Anthony gives a simple example of him and his family being keen on a new sort of cookies. He realized their craving for cookies increased as soon as they ran out of stock. Once they raised the inventory to 25 boxes of cookies, suddenly the cookies were not so special anymore, and they consumed less.
Today, you will start to complete your journey to personal freedom.
“The fourth agreement is about the action of the first three: ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST”
When I read this for the first time, I was concerned that Ruiz wanted us readers to push ourselves constantly to our limits. Like a super athlete aiming for the gold medal at the next Olympics. But this is actually not the case.
I understand it basically as an appeal to a consistent application of the first three agreements. “As you build the habit of the four agreements, your best will become better than it used to be.”
Ruiz lays emphasize on the fact that our best varies: “Everything is alive and changing all the time, so your best will sometimes be high quality, and other times it will be not as good.”
I see today lots of people at work and in their free time acting like crazy to achieve certain goals which were actually set by other people. Ruiz encourages us not to do that, and I love the example he gives about the meditation in the Buddhist temple: “You are not here to sacrifice your joy or your life. You are here to live, to be happy, and to love.”
I assume (!) it was great, and you are either desperately waiting for the third agreement or you have already bought the book (congratulations in that case).
Here we go:
The third agreement is: “Don’t make assumptions.”
“We make assumptions about what others are doing or thinking – we take it personally – then we blame them and react by sending emotional poison with our word.”
And “we are afraid to ask for clarification. (…) It is always better to ask questions than to make an assumption, because assumptions set us up for suffering.”
When I read this, I was immediately reminded of an encounter a few years back. I felt annoyed first, then emberrassed, and today I find it amusing:
Have you been impeccable with your word? Yes? Fantastic. But it was so hard? Sure it was.
Here’s the second agreement for you, warrior: “Don’t take anything personally.”
Well, haven’t we heard that before? Isn’t it easily said, but so difficult to do? I can tell you, I can be quite emotional and short-tempered at times – oh, let me correct: I was emotional and short-tempered!
Once you truly get the point that “NOTHING other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves” you will understand that this is the key to equanimity. You only take something personally “when you agree with whatever was said.” So just don’t. Really don’t.
“Whatever other people think or feel, it is their problem, not your problem. If someone get’s mad at you they are dealing with themselves. You are just the excuse for them to get mad. They get mad because they are dealing with fear.”